Point A to Point B: This is the In-Between

Chemisty and Timing

Its amazing to me how applicable the “lessons” I learn from How I Met Your Mother are. It certainly hit me in the ass to watch that episode on the value of chemistry and timing a few days ago. Call it the return of a former flame that may not have completely died down… even over the span of over four years.

I never even imagined, not in a million years, that I’d ever encounter him again. But there he was… right in front of me. The chemistry was undeniably still there. But, alas, timing would prove to still not agree with us.

Maybe that’s just the way its really supposed to be. I’ve moved on in so many ways. Perhaps I’m really just supposed to keep moving on.

Oh, life! Please don’t let me grow to be an old maid. @_@

The Non-Maid of Honor Speech

Yesterday, my older sister, Paulina, got married to Nacho Mendezona. I wrote a maid of honor speech for Jessica, because she was having a hard time figuring out what to say. But I figured it wouldn’t be a nice idea to have her read my words, especially since its written in my perspective. I think yesterday was the first time I ever truly cried tears of joy, and, needless to say, I cried buckets and buckets of it. So this is what would have been my message for them.

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Paulina is my ate. For my entire life, I was recognized as “the sister of Pauline”. Its not really much of a surprise. She was great at everything that she did, and she looked gorgeous as she did them. The straight honor student, soloist ballerina, pianist, football star. Yes, she did everything. Everything she had and did, to me, was the best of everything.

I wanted to be just like her. People saw it as a sibling rivalry, but, in truth, I was always just trying to measure up to her. Whether it was in academics, athletics, or just plain drinking. She made me want to be better, and she always did push me to become just that. Yes, we always argued (understatement of the year), because I wasn’t doing this and that the way I was supposed to.

I always wanted to be so like her, that anything that she would say, I believed. As a kid, she even cut off my bangs to just one inch. Take note. She didn’t cut off one inch, she cut it down to one inch. It looked ridiculous, but I still felt like it was the right thing. After all, she did it.

Fast forward to our ballerina years. Just a child in grade school, she was sent off to Subic to represent the country for an international ballet production. How many people can say that they did that? She was so young, and she went on her own. No need for a chaperone. She could handle it.

When we played football, if she wasn’t the best, she was definitely one of them. Amazing kick, intense speed, smart movement, and an intense amount of passion. She was Captain O.C. leading Miriam Football to what became the most successful years of the team.

I honestly don’t think I would have amounted to much in anything if it hadn’t been for you, Pauline. You both inspire and torment me. And no matter how much we fight over all the things in the world, I love you and I’m so grateful to have you as a sister.

I remember Pauline used to go to school in pajamas. Not caring about what other people thought of her appearance. Its UP, after all. You don’t have to care at all. That’s generally how she is actually. But as time passed by, my mom and I noticed that she began dressing up for school. Actually looking decent and well-kept for class in UP. As it turns out, Nacho was her classmate. Thank you, Nacho. For turning our sister back into a girl.

Nacho was always like a big brother to me. While my sister told me about all the perils of going to UP, Nacho always told me about how awesome it was to be there. Going off to college didn’t seem like such a scary thing anymore, for as long as I knew that Nacho would be there.

He makes my sister happy in so many ways. I remember the way they held each other during those first few month that they dated. One instance in particular. They were in one of the nipa huts at the field of the Marikina Sports Center during the World Cup football festival that Pauline organized herself. Today, when I look at them… even when they fight about so many things, they always seem to snap back into that couple in the nipa hut. No fail. I swear.

I was always there for all of my sister’s relationships. From all the teddy bears and random gifts that she would get from suitors from all over Metro Manila, to the Ateneo Football visits we made which were really just their excuse to meet up. Believe me, plenty of people wanted Pauline. I sold copies of her pictures for 300 pesos each, to boys and girls alike. They sold like pancakes.

Regardless of that, I can honestly say that Nacho is different from everyone else. He wasn’t flashy like the rest, he was simple. He was unbelievably patient, super fun to be with, and crazy sweet. The best part, he loved everything about Pauline. Even the stuff that we all find annoying.

They are soulmates. I once wrote in a blog, they are the couple that we aspire to be like. They give us hope that true love does still exist and that it is indeed possible to find that one perfect match to share our lives with.

My advice is for Nacho. Hug my sister as much as you can. Because aside from Baby Zac, you’re the only who ever gets to do that, and sometimes that all she really needs. A hug from you to help her calm down and feel safe again.

I love you both, and I wish you all the best.

Education

Does education in the Philippines fulfill the pursuit of knowledge and development? Does it continue to provide a vehicle by which our people can improve our nation?

Filipino heroes like Jose Rizal emphasize the importance of educating the youth, as they are the hope of the nation. True enough, this is a value that is imparted in a majority of the Filipinos who believe that educational attainment is the single most valuable asset that can be inherited by each generation from their parents.

However, due to lack of accessibility of “quality education”, most Filipinos are disheartened and fail to pursue their education, and instead take any means and opportunity to earn any form of living.

I personally believe that for any nation to be able to achieve any form of long-term solution to the poverty that is so absurdly rampant in our country, proper education of the masses is imperative. I do not mean the type that will teach them vocational courses so that they may become skilled individuals, but to impart unto them the same opportunity for a wider breadth of knowledge that, most usually, only the elite are afforded.

The trouble with Philippine education is that while the public school system does indeed exist, the quality of the education provided to the students is far less than that given to the privileged that can afford private schooling.

I want to emphasize here two important points: the disparity in the quality of education between private and public schools, and the ability of the great majority of the population to afford a quality education.

“To leave children in the care of the public school system, in the view of many parents today, is to automatically destroy their chances of entering a good university.” (When Parents Graduate, PDI, April 25, 1999)

Education is a right and a public good that the government should provide to its constituents. This is apparently not the case in the Philippines, where the government continually provides lackluster facilities and underpays its faculty and staff, and annually cuts down the budget allocated to education. It does this on the notion that the private sector should be the one to act to become the “movers of the nation”. This completely contradicts the role of the government in this matter and violates the right of the people who are far less privileged to have the opportunity to pursue an education of (at least) a considerable amount of quality.

Take the case of the University of the Philippines for example. Due to the high standards in order to be accepted into the university, few are accepted. Among those few, what percentage of the students would have come from a private school, and from a public school? Chances are that a majority of the students would have come from some private school (whether well-recognized or not), and the minority from some public school. Among that minority, a percentage of the accepted students will choose not to pursue their education in UP for the reason that they cannot afford the tuition (due to the increase in TOFI) and/or perhaps they cannot afford the living costs that come with pursuing a higher education.

Next, if and when students are able to afford the privilege of an education (whether at a premier university or not), are they being taught to be members of the labor force, or to be the future leaders of the country? Do they pursue their collegiate diploma with the ambition of greatness in contribution to society, or for the mere achievement of attaining a formal education and then only to settle for low-paying jobs or occupations abroad?

I have met plenty of individuals in the work field whom have graduated with degrees in engineering, computer science, political science, and criminology, to name a few, who currently work as housekeepers, and whose great ambition—after striving so hard to complete their education—is to become housekeepers aboard a cruise ship that will take them abroad. That’s it. They have worked hard. Their parents have worked hard. Only for them to settle to become the members of the “low” end of the labor force; not only that, but to become members of the labor force of an entirely different country and society. Great. This is what our education system is producing.

This poses an issue of empowerment among the masses. If and when they are able to complete their formal education, will they be empowered enough to pursue what they studied for? Or does their pursuit of knowledge and education stop after graduation? Are they left to foster an apathetic attitude towards our nation? Are they led to believe that they are capable of greatness, or are they kept to believe that they are destined to remain impoverished and marginalized?

I am a product of a private school education that has taught me that I am a capable agent of change. I am a product of a private school education that has equipped me with the necessary tools and MINDSET that have prepared me for the rigorous academic environment and training of the University of the Philippines. I know that I can contribute in the creation of nationhood in our country, but how many others are there like me whom are prepared to do the same thing?

Does the general education in the Philippines fulfill the pursuit of knowledge and development? Perhaps. Does it continue to provide a vehicle by which our people can improve our nation? Somewhat.

The government, from my perspective, does not seem to move remedy this. The government, from my perspective, seems to rely on public-private partnerships; or actually more on just private initiatives. Now, my question is: How does the government plan to rely on private initiatives, when the very same private sector that it relies on is the same private sector that seeks to keep its wealth intact and its (cheap) labor force in existence?

The reason why…

Over the past year, I’ve had some pretty bizarre romantic encounters, to say the least. From a short-lived whirlwind in the summer, to a bring-back-the-fire sort of thing, to month-long flings, to a two-date marriage proposal, and finally, to two marriage proposals through Facebook from complete strangers. I guess I could say that its been quite a crazy year for me in this aspect of my life. And people still often ask me why I’m still single. I’ll tell you why.

I’m not in pursuit of Mr. Right, nor of Mr. Right-Now. I don’t even think that the perfect man for me exists, as I can definitely say that I’ve dated men whom I’ve thought to be perfect, but turned out not so. Things usually just happen. Sparks fly and you just feel like you click. But then again, if you can’t feed the fire, sparks eventually just die down. I guess that’s what generally happens to me.

All I can say is that all I truly want is a partner in life. And not necessarily in a romantic sense. I want someone who’ll be a jock playing football, who’ll channel his inner artist when I want to go dancing at a club, or even at a studio for some hiphop. I want someone who’ll have both the humor of my funniest friends, and the ability to have good intellectual conversations. And finally, I want someone who’ll be game to go out on spontaneous adventures, but still would be perfectly happy to stay in watching an old movie and pigging out on junk food on a couch.

I’m still single because this partner hasn’t come along yet…again. ;)

August 19

Almost 2 years since the last time we got to celebrate your birthday with you. We’ll celebrate it the way we used to. Movies, chips, and dinner too. Then after, you can go off to meet your best friends. Okay? Sounds like a good plan to me.

There is no such thing as martyrdom. Just stupidity trying to justify itself.

It’s terribly frustrating to know how truly hopeless some people are because they simply refuse to grow up and take action. There is a difference between being “understanding” and being stupid enough to believe that martyrdom will ever get you anywhere except a grave. Newsflash: Martyrs are only honored years after their deaths…the exact amount of time that the same people that they wanted to “save” spent giving them hell in the first place. 

Respect yourself. Never rationalize anything that pertains to any form of maltreatment; whether at work, play, and/or relationships. Learn to have the balls to stand up for yourself. PLEASE. Because no one else can do it for you but yourself

The Universe Reminding Me of My Vision

I came across this little girl in Katipunan yesterday. She’s definitely a lot different from the usual annoying kids that you see there, asking for change and cursing you if you didn’t give them anything.

No, this little girl didn’t ask me for anything. Barely covered in her tattered rags, she just sat in her chair, looked up, and smiled at me.

There was something about her cheerfulness that made me just want to help her in some way. We chatted a little about what she was doing there, where her parents were, and if she’d eaten already.

She doesn’t know where her mom is. Her dad is in prison for some sort of trouble. She didn’t mention where she lived. She doesn’t go to school.

I wanted to take care of her, but reality bites. I can barely take care of myself. So I just did the only thing that I could do at the moment. I bought her and her little brother dinner.

I wish I could do more for her. Such a nice little kid with a good disposition and outlook despite everything that’s happened to her family has all the potential in the world to become great.

Someday, there will come a time when I will be able to do more for the children like her that I meet. I want to make sure of that.